The Heartbreakers

How to cushion the blow before and after a disappointing performance.

By Colleen Wood-Smith

CBN Dec/Jan 2009

In case your staff hasn’t yet noticed, it’s not uncommon for competitive athletes—especially all-star cheerleaders—to expect the gold standard from their teammates: a flawless performance, a trophy win or a front-and-center spot among the very best. But what happens if a stunt drops, a tumbling pass goes out of bounds or another team unexpectedly swoops in to steal the show?

For many coaches, dealing with team disappointment is no easy feat, especially when you fingers are being pointed at the athlete who took a spill or select cheer parents are voicing their concerns at all the wrong moments.

Read up on these six big ways to help your squads deal with disappointment during the brunt of the competition season.

1. Kick off the season with All-Star 101.

If your program is best known for its first-place trophies and laundry list of championship titles, it’s even more important to reiterate to new athletes at the beginning of the year that winning is never a guarantee, nor should it be the only goal the team works towards throughout the year. Some coaches, like Melissa Munoz, owner of River City All-Stars in Austin, TX, opt for a reality check right off the bat. “We show our cheerleaders—especially the first-year competitors—videos of past competitions so they can get a realistic view of what they’re like and what to expect,” she says. “We want the kids to know that all-star cheer is different from Pop Warner and school cheerleading. Watching competition videos makes everything less of a shock.”

Munoz adds that reviewing past score sheets to break down exactly what each field means also helps kids gain a better understanding of what’s expected and desired from behind the judging table. “If you give the athletes enough information, it definitely gets them more prepared,” she says.

2. Enforce parent rules and restrictions at the start of the cheer year.

While many cheer parents generously lend a hand and support their children, a few bad apples could easily send your athletes’ emotions over the edge and cause disappointment later on if things don’t go well on the mat. “We have something called ‘Cheer Time,’ when it’s time to have the kids separate from their families at competition so we can work,” says Coach Jeff Manhart of New Jersey’s South Jersey Storm All-Stars.

Manhart, who sends packets with parent rules home at the beginning of the year, asks that parents keep competition complaints at bay until after event day when everyone’s back at the gym. “It helps because sometimes parents can stress kids out without even meaning to or realizing it, just by doing something like trying to fix their hair.”

A few other rules to include in the parent packet? Never approach or bombard a judge about a performance score and always display good sportsmanship in the venue and at the hotel. Kids are always watching and will often emulate you, whether your actions are good or bad—monkey see, monkey do.

3. Never place blame or point fingers.

The biggest mistake a coach can make is pointing the finger at an individual or a group of individuals for a mishap on the mat. Remember: Kids aren’t oblivious, and if someone made a glaring error, the team is already well aware of why the problem occurred. “Sometimes a cheerleader will be on the mat, make a mistake and [glance] over at one of us [coaches] with a distraught look on her face,” says Munoz. “I always make a gesture that it’s fine and to keep going. If something happens, they need to know that they should finish the routine.”

Jason Janke, program director at Cheerz Cheerleading Gym in Bountiful, UT, notes that a gym typically sees more athletes placing blame on each other at the beginning of the year, but this should eventually diminish as the months go on. “If you’re a good coach, you’ll see [blame] happen in the beginning, but it’ll get better if the staff is attentive,” he says. “We teach [our athletes] that we win as a team, lose as a team, and that we all make mistakes.”

Point blank: If someone in your program lashes out at another athlete due to a mistake, don’t let the words or attitude go unnoticed. Deal with it on the spot—it’ll make your team stronger and tighter in the end.

4. Encourage sportsmanship 24/7.

There’s always that one team that leaves the awards ceremony early after not placing first at an event. Not surprisingly, it’s usually the talk of the competition and one that lingers for years to come.

Don’t forget that your athletes pick up what your staff members do and say, so now is your chance to teach them a lesson about good values. “We stress that we never want to make someone feel like they shouldn’t be [at a competition],” says Manhart. “We tell our athletes to look at the other cheerleaders as ‘real people’ versus seeing them as just their competition.”

Manhart also explains that reaching out to other athletes should be the norm and that it can actually help kids when coping with a team loss or injury. “Our program has ‘Make Friends Time,’ where the kids go out and meet new people before awards start,” he says. “There isn’t a cheerleader out there who’ll deny you a ‘hello’ or a friendship, and we remind our kids that we see the same people over and over again at competitions.”

With MySpace and Facebook going stronger than ever, some athletes and coaches use these social networking sites as sportsmanship tools to support other teams and send good luck wishes. “We’ve linked up with other programs across the country through MySpace, and the kids have really created a strong sense of community and friendship,” says Munoz.

5. Review score sheets as a group.

Since today’s score sheets tend to be more accurate and detailed, review and discuss every single thing that could have been done differently as soon as the comments land in your hands. Some coaches choose to do so at the event, while others wait until the first practice back (if the score sheets affect a second-day performance, though, don’t wait). “Our staff usually meets together first and then we talk to the athletes,” says Janke, adding that this helps to avoid confusion or differing opinions that the staff may have.

If an entire dance count was off or motions and skills were sloppy, point out general group mistakes first, rather than a comment that might state, “Front tumbler with blonde hair went out of bounds.”

Use these score sheets as a motivator, not a disabler. Bring them to practice the following week and include everyone in a positive, open discussion on how to fix the routine’s flaws.

6. At the first practice back home, start fresh.

Your team placed fifth instead of first, or your team’s main stunt group crashed during the last 20 seconds of the routine last weekend. So what?

While evaluating your team’s performance and learning from mistakes are extremely important, remind your athletes that as of this practice and on, it’s a brand new day, with more competitions and events to be had. “You have to deal with problems from a positive perspective,” adds Janke. “But you also have to resolve them, or you’ll be doing your kids a disservice in the end.”